Picture this…
You’re in the beautiful city of Chicago… You want to do the touristy things (and if possible avoid getting held up on the CTA — but that’s another post). So in that spirit, you decide to visit the tallest building in the US, and the 4th tallest in the world. (Because that is exactly what girls who have an irrational fear of heights do. It’s how we roll, ya know.)
The Sears Tower. Or the Willis Tower if you find yourself reading this after June 2009.
The building is impossibly tall. It’s one of those structures that you have to bend over backward to see the top of from the ground. It’s almost surreal to see something so tall. So you pay your $12.99, and you step on to the elevator. Two minutes later you step out on to the Sky Deck. And the view is… Amazing.
Wait. Not that view.
That view. (The train station we rode in to. Did you know you can drink alcohol on Metra? Interesting, but I digress.)
Or that one. (The interchange we found ourselves on after receiving bad directions from the non-english speaking front desk attendant at the hotel. Again, another blog post entirely.)
Being slightly afraid of heights and suddenly feeling a little woozy, you snap your pictures. Being a tourist, you head to the gift shop. (I do LOVE a good gift shop. Where better to find tacky crap that my kids will either lose or destroy inside a day and a half than the highest gift shop in the country?) After oogling the t-shirts and shot glasses, you turn around and are faced with this:
Oh my Holy GOD. Is that???
Thinking that you are probably suffering hallucinations from altitude sickness (Or undercooked deep dish pizza — once again, another post for another time), you turn 180 degrees and are met with this….
A Bobble Head you can believe in. (I might have giggled just a little bit when I read “Wacky Wobbler”. Just saying.)
Not to be outdone by the Obama action figure or the Obama bobble head (And apparently on clearance at the low low price of two for five dollars…) we have:
Barack Obama candy bars.
Yes, you read that correctly. An Obama Change bar.
I’ll sit back for a few minutes while you absorb all of this insanity before I present you with the Pièce de résistance.
You, yes YOU, can own your own Lifesize Obama standup.
*blinks twice*
Wow. That’s all I have. Wow.
And for the record, I didn’t leave with any of the above merchandise. Nor did I purchase an Obama deck of cards, Obama wrapping paper, or the ever popular Obama glow in the dark fridge magnet. Believe ME. It was really hard to pass up the magnet.
It does speak volumes though…
I did an ambulance standby last August before the election. We were set up across a from an Obama booth and people were getting their pictures taken next to the Obama life-sized cardboard cutout. Just a little bit of insanity.
I can’t believe the pedestal the good people of this country have put this man on. He may be President, but after all he is only a man. Makes you wonder when the suggestion to replace a President’s face on our money comes up. Maybe an Obama one dollar bill? Or how about the $100 bill, Franklin wasn’t even a President you know, and not near the man of Obama!
There is nothing wrong with being proud of a home town boy who went off and made something of himself. On the other hand, pride taken to excess can become parody.
“There is nothing wrong with being proud of a home town boy who went off and made something of himself.”
Ever hear the name “Emil Jones” Randy?
Epijunky – love the blog.
Wifey, baby and I are going to be in Chicago in June for 2 weeks. Do you have any hints or tips about where to visit? We’re not foodies at all – just need what to do between shopping and visiting family.
Thanks!
Damn…I would have driven to you, paid you double your cost for one of those bobble heads…An Obama Bobble head! That says it ALL! I am on the floor………….
Jumblerant – mypπ (mypie). It’s a pizza place not too far from lincoln park.
You must get italian beef.
The Museum of Science and Industry – allow an entire day, and do use the on-site parking. The tidbit about parking is from the incredibly level-headed and frugal father-in-law, so there’s good reason to do as he says.
Shedd was fun. I enjoyed the planetarium, too.
My husband is from Chicago. I’d never had interest in going til he took me :D